There are two kinds of people in the world, those who feels responsible for what happens to others and guilty about their own accountability to fixing relationships, and those who use others’ sensitivity and sometimes guilt to get what they want. These last-mentioned people focus only on their own needs without any empathy for others. They feel entitled and are oblivious of others feelings and needs or the impact of their own attitude on others. Their grandiosity and arrogance impairs their sensitivity to others which results in the inability to recognize the negative consequences of their behavior. This is the difference between grandiose people and those who suffer shame. We are all entangled in this vicious destructive cycle of behavior and need to change it together.

Psychology has mostly focused on helping to empower those who feel victimized, but those who feel entitled are continuing to naively bully the rest. We are conditioned through our cultural ideas and idealizations to devalue the softer feminine qualities of life and people. Our culture honors production and consumption with an aggressive greed, not compassion and respect. Therefore we don’t prepare our children properly for balanced intimate or social relationships.

The symbolism of the tendency to abuse the softer and gentler qualities in people and Nature happens all over our world today. The ‘rape’ of women in India, the ‘rape’ of our earth in the way our industries are ripping out resources without considering the long-term consequences, the disregard for our gentler cultures, for emotions, our spirit and unconscious mind, are but some examples. Not only do men have to face their arrogance and woman how they enable the arrogance in the masculine, but cultural groups and anyone who takes the position of the grandiose entitled and those who hold the shamed guilty position, tending emotions and nurturing, need to do the same.

Our cultural and political leaders as well as the healers in our society need to guide by example and face their own challenges with courage and transparency. This is the only way we can create a better world together for the future of our children. Those of us who are entitled and grandiose need to step down from our thrones and become more compassionate and responsible and those of us who are full of shame and responsibility need to become more assertive and less enabling of the grandiose.

Read more about the healing journey and the healing principles in my book: The Riddle in the Mirror

Blessings to you,

Jayni

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